Hole In My Heart
I cried on the way to work today... cried at least once this morning... and am tearing up now, on my lunch hour.
Keira is going to Iraq. She has a fabulous new job, one that is perfect for her and for which she is perfect. She'll be running an MWR facility, and I guarantee the troops that use that facility, will be the most well-cared-for troops in the entire war. This is a dream for her, and one of those rare instances where you know someone up there really got it right.
But.
Her going-away party is this weekend - and so is my Mommy-and-Me weekend with Red. In Dallas. And that has to take precedence. Keira understands completely. Still, that means that, effectively, last night was the last time I will see Keira before she goes to Iraq. The last time, period, for at least a very long time. And I'm not ready. I'm not ready for her to be gone. It's not like she's going away forever, and not like we're not going to burn up the Internet chatting and e mailing constantly. But it's not the same. And I'm not ready. And that makes me wonder how I will handle other goodbyes I'm expecting in the near future. I'm having to face the fact that what is best, is not always easy-and that even knowing that it is what is best, doesn't make it even a little bit easier.
*sigh*
Being a grown-up sucks.
Keira is going to Iraq. She has a fabulous new job, one that is perfect for her and for which she is perfect. She'll be running an MWR facility, and I guarantee the troops that use that facility, will be the most well-cared-for troops in the entire war. This is a dream for her, and one of those rare instances where you know someone up there really got it right.
But.
Her going-away party is this weekend - and so is my Mommy-and-Me weekend with Red. In Dallas. And that has to take precedence. Keira understands completely. Still, that means that, effectively, last night was the last time I will see Keira before she goes to Iraq. The last time, period, for at least a very long time. And I'm not ready. I'm not ready for her to be gone. It's not like she's going away forever, and not like we're not going to burn up the Internet chatting and e mailing constantly. But it's not the same. And I'm not ready. And that makes me wonder how I will handle other goodbyes I'm expecting in the near future. I'm having to face the fact that what is best, is not always easy-and that even knowing that it is what is best, doesn't make it even a little bit easier.
*sigh*
Being a grown-up sucks.
posted by SaraSmile | 9:42 AM
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